Nightlife
We walk at night, our children asleep, through the streets of the Village filled with the same people as in the day now drunk and louder. Not a city but a playground for the wealthy in their twenties. On the sidewalks and doorways each pod a bubble of shared experiences and expectations, wrapped in their confidence of being correct. But I am harsh. It is that they are drunk and I am not, but I have been drunk before and remember feeling how they feel. And I am filled with shame ...
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The Part About the Crimes
I am halfway through a second reading of 2666 and recently made it to the section which inspired me to read the book again: The Part About the Crimes. It feels strange to write that I enjoy this section (and I do, immensely), because it is a frantic account of a series of murders of young women in the city of Santa Teresa, the main setting of the novel. It is the longest of five ‘parts’ in the book, and unlike any of the other four which focus on single or small group of characters. The Part Ab...
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Still at home
The kids are now back at school during the day but I remain working from home, and I am left with a strange echo of the pre-COVID era. In that other life I would work from home one day a week and it was my professional highlight of the week every time. After seeing my children onto the bus, I would practically skip back home to bask in the luxury of wearing sweat pants and working with my laptop on the couch. But these two days have felt empty in the house and I’ve experienced waves of unease, a...
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Re-opening the school
Our elementary schools opened today. Instead of the hybrid, two-days a week model that had been planned for and discussed (at length) for the last year, this was full-time five-days-a-week open for real. My feelings have been mixed. I have a lot of anger about the way in which the switch to a full-time reopening was discussed (not at all) and announced (without warning) and the slap-dash manner in which all manner of details and decisions were then subsequently made. Those children unwilling or ...
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Massage
During my massage today I thought about how rare it is for me to enjoy concentrated attention from someone else. The physical sensations of the massage were wonderful and restorative, but the luxury of the experience was from not having to worry about anything other than my own sensations. It was a warm cocoon in which I was the bright center of the universe for ninety minutes. And it was the enjoyment of that experience which I am holding on to now, hours later. It feels like that was what I pa...
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NanoStudio 2
I have again spent time with NanoStudio 2 on my iPad this week, and it has been productive to change things up. I see this pattern in my creative work: a particular platform will interest me and I will create, but then it’s limitations and inherent friction become too much, and then it is time for a change. This time it has been Ableton 11 and MPE. My initial enthusiasm for both deteriorated into technical frustration and a feeling of being overwhelmed when sitting down at the computer. It is to...
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Commute
I get off the train at Civic Center Station in San Francisco. A company that provides therapy via an app has bought all of the ad space in the station this month, and the campaign features pictures of Michael Phelps extolling the benefits he has received from therapy. In one ad, plastered on the station floor directly in front of the escalators, Mr. Phelps has been defaced with a rather well-drawn Captain-Morgan’s-style mustache. The app charges $70 a week via an auto-renewing subscription. To...
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I have started biking
I have started biking. I bought a bike and now I feel young, like some version of those mid-20's bike messengers (I rolled up my pant leg on the ride to and from the train today). Especially when I wear the clip-in shoes, I feel like a perfect machine that can go anywhere forever. It is wonderful. My town is smaller now. The intuitive calculations of the distance between two points have been proved wrong. I now travel with the wind in my face and all around me, and I get where I am going befor...
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